I love words and I love a blank page ready to be filled with words. I started journaling my prayers around twelve years old when I was given a prayer journal filled with prompts which helped the reader combine prayer with journaling. Over the years, I have gone through different seasons varying in intensity form nursing school, working as a young adult, to a young mom. I have two children, 3 years old and 18 months and I have yet to really feel I have arrived at spending time with Jesus when my kids are around. I find the best time is to be awake before them and stay awake while I read and pray. However, realistically I do not wake up before them often. I say this because I want you to know that whatever season you are currently living in, you may have to adapt the time you spend with the Lord. However, the Lord KNOWS your season, whoever you are caring for or whatever difficulty is going on in your life, God is a gracious and loving God, and He wants to hear from you whatever that looks like in your life.

I am a recovering perfectionist with creative tendencies so seeing the words on the page helps me to feel grounded in good ways. I also love to be able to look through my prayers and see them answered. I’ll show you a picture of my current structure…

On the left-hand side, you will see prayer requests and people I pray for, this is not an exhaustive list but a sampling. I personally choose to pray for people as they come to mind so that means some people may get left off one day and added on the next day. I like to see it as God working in my memory to tell me who to pray for. Also, as a part of my prayer practice, I like to think of praises and/or things I am thankful for which I list at the top of each page. It is so exciting to move something from the left to the top of the page. The center section is my thoughts and reflections on scripture, sometimes I write out a long form prayer here. My early journals are all long letters to God, but in this season of my life I don’t have hours for my quiet time, sometimes I have minutes.

Lastly, a discipline I am working to strengthen in my life is the art of listening to God. I am trying to build up to ten minutes of quiet listening to God. I listen and if I don’t hear or see anything in my imagination, I move onwards. But sometimes, I’ll be given a word of encouragement in my mind’s eye or a picture, and I try to describe or even draw those here at the bottom of the page. If you are unfamiliar with the practice of listening prayer start short with two minutes of quiet at a time. Distracting thoughts will come but simply redirect yourself back to your goal.  

Prayer Journaling is an amazing tool that I have used over the years to focus and guide my time with the Lord, however, this may not work for everyone and that is okay! I offer my practices as suggestions. As you reflect on these ideas determine if any of them will work with your current season. The most important part of prayer is that we participate!

Rachel is the wife to Fr Michael Schwandt who is currently serving at St. Timothy’s Anglican Church. She is the mom to two little people. She enjoys reading books and drinking tea during nap time.

All you can do now is pray

“I have tried to convey my concerns to my boss, still nothing changes. All I can do now is pray.”

“Scan results came back. The cancer is spreading again, and every medical option has been exhausted. All I can do now is pray.”

Have you ever attached an all I can do now is pray sentiment at the end of a statement regarding some concern or difficult situation? I have, and, lately, the Holy Spirit has been challenging me about that. Although my all I can do now is pray statement rarely represents the beginning of my situation-specific prayers, all too often, I have unconsciously uttered all I can do now is pray as a sigh of resignation—treating prayer as a last-ditch-effort, a Hail-Mary shot into the endzone when the circumstances reached the point when I possessed neither any control nor other options.

Of course, prayer is not a sigh of resignation but a gift and a privilege and a powerful weapon. When we pray, we stand at the dangerous intersection of heaven and earth. Prayer, especially honest and raw intercession, is daring and costly to the pray-er. For prayer does not deny the presence of the difficulty (in whatever form it takes); prayer confronts it head-on. Accepting the reality of life’s uncertainties and sorrows, we profess God’s goodness and lovingkindness and pledge our trust in him. Recognizing lies, we wrest their strangulating tentacles and affirm truth. Acknowledging pain, we push back despair and declare hope. Moving toward those surrounded by darkness, we sit beside them and insist that no pit is too deep for God’s reach. Staring into brokenness, we remind that the story is still being written and determine to fill the margins with prayer as we wait for the page to turn. Facing death, we refuse to live in its shadow and dare to speak life.

As of late, my practice of prayer has included two intentional components. First, instead of saying, all I can do now is pray, I embrace the gift and privilege of prayer, announcing I get to pray for this! Second, I visualize the reality of what prayer is, that is, standing at the dangerous intersection of heaven and earth—one hand reaching toward God and one hand reaching out to a broken world.

Monica Napoli Warren in a nutshell: Perpetual student. Mediocre triathlete. Lousy cook. Devoted wife to one very patient man. Proud mom of two. Mimi to two. Lives in Mobile, Alabama; wishes Mobile had mountains. Reads lots about Jesus; spends lots of time asking Jesus questions. Goes around speaking of Jesus; hopes she’s starting to look more like Jesus. Her newest addition to “speaking of Jesus” is as a part-time professor, teaching religion at the University of South Alabama.

Knitting and Praying

“Yarn became my prayer beads.”
- Carolyn Boyd

Be still and know that I am God. But I don't do still. I go to the garden or kitchen, run errands, vacuum the car...as Gilda Radner said, “It’s always something”.

.... And so yarn became my prayer beads. Over ten years ago, I joined my church’s prayer shawl ministry. Dusting off college crochet skills, I began the practice of meditative handwork. Knitting or crochet uses up my itch to do, creates a gift for others and frees heart and mind to chat with God. In such quiet evening moments, I can reflection the day’s graces and missteps.

Whether I am praying for the intended recipient or meditating on my morning devotional, repetitive loops and stitches lull me into a quieter, slower place. Sometimes a problem or pain is lifted up as yarn slowly creates a pattern. And just as God directs me to fulfill His pattern for my life, I direct the needles or hook that sometimes, like me, don't want to go as directed.

Women have always found such repetitive movement, rock the baby, stir the pot, sew the stitch, spin the wool, as secret doorways to spiritual rest and reflection. Intriguing to the uninitiated, such crafts spark conversations in waiting rooms or a park bench. But the completed object also carries a trace of the prayers and petitions said over it. Prayer
shawls made at Saint Timothy's are ceremonially blessed and some recipients say they find healing in their comfort, but all say they feel the love of the maker. God gives us multiple avenues to his presence. Mine are frequently baby caps for refugees or a prayer shawl for someone in pain, but they are always a gift to my own soul.

Carolyn Boyd
St. Timothy’s Anglican, Spring
lynnpraytor@sbcglobal.net

Carolyn would like to extend a warm invitation to anyone who would like to visit, attend regularly or who has questions about forming a knitting, crocheting, or crafting circle. She hosts one at St Timothy’s on the 1st and 3rd Fridays 9:30-11:30 am.

Is Prayer your Steering Wheel or Spare Tire?

- Corrie Ten Boom

How often has my prayer life been much more about being stuck somewhere on the side of life's highway? Then drag out the spare tire and beg God to allow me to get back onto the highway as soon as possible. Perhaps if I had invested time in praying and seeking God's direction more consistently, I might have avoided the flat tire.

Building a solid and vibrant prayer life is not easy. So, this summer, the ladies of the Diocese of the Western Gulf Coast want to share two prayer tools a week to help us all invest in communicating with God in new and meaningful ways.

We are beginning on Summer Prayer Challenge on Pentecost Sunday because Pentecost is all about communication with God and the soul-refreshing experience of encountering the Holy Spirit –essential elements for prayer. Two times a week, on Mondays and Thursdays, we will share a new blog post written by other Anglican women featuring different prayer tools. In sharing these tools, we hope to answer questions about prayer that some of you have asked.

This summer, our challenge for each of you is to try one new prayer tool a week. Or go back to using a tool you are reminded about in one of the posts.

Check out the prayer walk from our Spring Retreat as the first prayer tool we shared on Pentecost Sunday. It’s a great way to get started on prayer wherever you find yourself this summer, and there is no walking required.

Prayer Walk

If you choose to participate in our Summer Prayer Challenge or have questions, let us know on social media or use our email address: womensministry@dwgc.org

We would love to hear from you! In the meantime, please know that we are cheering you all on.

Anthea Kotlan

Women's Ministry Coordinator

Diocese of the Western Gulf Coast

Going Out

We begin this retreat learning to come to a place of rest with God. For some of us, that means an everyday event. For others, it may mean a once a week, or even once a month, refresher time. Perhaps it’s a yearly event that takes you away from your home for a few days. For us this weekend it means taking time to be in communion with our sisters as we rested with God.

We will rest. We will sit at the feet of Jesus and listen to his voice. We will breathe in his holiness and let all of our anxieties and cares flow out as we exhale. We will feel refreshed, like the deer at the river. His cool, clear water of life has flowed over us, through us. Maybe for the first time in a long time we can enjoy the beauty of the world and delight in his creation. 

And in this idyllic moment comes the thought, what now? Can I just stay here forever? Can I just let the world go on around me and cocoon myself in this love? And even as we ask it, we know the answer – no. We have kingdom work to do – not for God’s sake. He can do all things with or without us. But he chooses to do all things with us – for our good, as well as that of others. There are moments out there waiting for your touch, your words, your prayers. 

And that is where we will be at the end of the day. We will have learned what it is to come in to his rest. Then, we will work on how to go out of this place with his refreshment still intact in our hearts. 

There are several moments where Jesus called his disciples to action. We see one of them in the verses just before the passage we have been studying. In Mark, chapter 6, verses 7-13 we read:

And he called the twelve and began to send them out two by two, and gave them authority over the unclean spirits. He charged them to take nothing for their journey except a staff – no bread, no bag, no money in their belts – but to wear sandals and not to put on two tunics. And he said to them, “Whenever you enter a house, stay there until you depart from there. And if any place will not receive you and they will not listen to you, when you leave, shake off the dust that is on your feet as a testimony against them.” So they went out and proclaimed people should repent. And they cast out many demons and anointed with oil many who were sick and healed them.

This, then, was what they were doing prior to their need for rest. They had gone out on their own, without Jesus physically right beside them, and had done kingdom work. They took Jesus out to the world. They came in tired, but excited about the outcome. And Jesus calls them to rest. According to one Christian teacher, this is what we might call the rhythm of Christian life. It is a continuous going into the presence of God from the presence of men and coming out into the presence of men from the presence of God. 

There are two dangers in this Christian life: too much activity – never stopping to come to the presence of God, never taking time to hear the voice of God in a quiet space. And on the other hand, there can be too much withdrawal – never wanting to leave the resting place to go out into the world. 

As Christians, we need to come into a balance of these two opposites. While we cannot live well without time with God, we are just as fruitless when we seek the fellowship of God to the exclusion of the fellowship of men. It is much like our physical lives – we cannot work unless we have had rest, and we cannot rest well if we have not put forth some work to make us tired.

So we go out from our restful place, having listened quietly to God while we rested. And now we have to make a choice. There are several points to make about your leaving the restful place. And they are found in that passage I read, verses 7-13.

First, Jesus gave his disciples authority. If you had his authority, what could you do for the kingdom? There is freedom in this statement. When a king gave someone else his authority, then that meant they spoke only what they had been given to speak, and did only what had been authorized to do. If you have the authority of Jesus, then you speak His words, do His work, show His love. Not on your own – nothing comes from you but that which comes through Christ first if you are in this mode. So, you have the authority of Jesus with you. 

Jesus also told them to go forth in simplicity. Again, there is that freedom. You don’t have to have a bag of “spiritual tricks” that you carry with you. You have your testimony and the authority of Christ. Your credentials are your intimate relationship with Jesus. We don’t have and we don’t need anything else. The heavy baggage of the Pharisees was something Jesus dropped long ago. Don’t pick it back up. Tell your story and do what your hands have to do. The rest will speak for itself.

Jesus also sent his disciples out with the command to respond to hospitality. What does that mean? In the passage, he tells them to find a place to stay and not to move from place to place. He tells them to finish what they were sent out to do in that town and then move on to the next place. 

For some of us, it would mean when we are reaching out to someone and they are responding to Christ through and in us, we don’t walk away from that opportunity. For others, it means going back to the daily grind of life – the not so exciting routine – finding purpose in serving God in whatever we are doing. For others, it means starting at something we have never done before. 

Whatever we find ourselves doing as we come out of our rest, we need to do it diligently. We need to recognize that it’s in the daily living – the breathing in and breathing out – it’s in these times that much kingdom work gets done. 

So, to recap, find your balance. Time in rest; time in work. Remember you go out with the authority of Jesus. Keep it simple. And stick with the opportunity God has given you. 

A word of caution: sometimes, when you have gone out, you will meet adversity. When that happens, do as Jesus commanded: move on. Let it go. Not everything will fall into place as we answer the call that Jesus sends out through you. Doesn’t make you a failure – it makes you a disciple. Keep going. 

Answer these questions after thought and reflection on past, present and future.

• Reflect and journal on the thought that you go out from resting with the authority of Jesus. What does that mean for you? How does it feel? 

• When you look at your past “work” time in the kingdom, do you find you were carrying more baggage than necessary? Were you making the gospel about more than the gospel? How can you simplify your ministry? Your everyday life?

• Where do you see yourself as you leave the resting place of today? Do you see yourself jumping into busy activity mode? Do you see yourself assisting another who is in busy mode? Do you see yourself afraid to move forward in some activity or ministry because it’s just too daunting? Do you need more time with God? 

You are a daughter of God. Hopefully you will be refreshed by the strength of Christ on Saturday. You’ve been given his authority, his words, his hands. Be assured Christ is with you as you step out in faith. Now, go and prepare for those five thousand hungry folks!

Our Comfort and Refuge

A DEVOTIONAL FOR OUR COME AWAY VIRTUAL QUIET DAY ON OCTOBER 17TH. CLICK HERE FOR MORE INFORMATION.

He said to them, “Come away to a deserted place all by yourselves and rest a while.” For many were coming and going, and they had no leisure even to eat. And they went away in the boat to a deserted place by themselves. Mark 6:31-32

I believe that the message in this passage is more than an invitation to be alone with Jesus for a time of rest; it is an invitation to be still and hear the Word of God; to reflect upon its meaning and application to one’s life. 

When I spend time alone with the Lord, reading, understanding, and meditating on His Word, it is in the stillness, silence, and solitude that I am convicted of my sins and comforted in my sorrows and struggles. It is there that He leads and guides me, there that He transforms me.

Recently I find myself troubled by what is happening in America, particularly by the political and partisan enmity. Both those on the left and those on the right of the political divide seem to view the upcoming election as a contest for the soul of our country. As I read the news I find myself angry, frustrated, fearful, worried, anxious, sad. I focus often on the problems facing our country rather than on the Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:6).

Studying Psalms 1 and 2 has convicted and comforted me, led and guided me to think differently; it has transformed me by the renewing of my mind (Romans 12:2). Psalm 1:2 states that those whose delight is in the law of the Lord and who meditate on His law day and night are happy. This “happy” is not so much a mood as it is a state of being. If I think deeply on the law of the Lord and find pleasure in doing so, then I will be happy. I will not feel the negative emotions that I experience when I make the latest news my meditation. 

Psalm 2:1-2, 4, reminds me that although the nations conspire, the peoples plot in vain, and the kings and rulers of the earth take counsel together, setting themselves against the Lord and His anointed, it is the Lord who sits in the heavens laughing and holding them in derision. God laughs at the rulers of the earth who plot and scheme in rebellion against His sovereignty, thereby revealing how absurd He considers their machinations.

Psalm 146:3-6 reiterates some of these ideas as well. Here we are admonished not to put our trust in princes, in mortals, in whom there is no help, because when their breath departs, their plans perish. Instead, it says that happy are those whose help is the God of Jacob, whose hope is in the Lord their God.

So, having been convicted of not trusting wholly in the Lord, I am now comforted in meditating on the sovereignty of God. No matter who wins the election, our Lord Jesus Christ is the blessed and only Sovereign, the King of kings and Lord of Lords (1Timothy 6:14-15). He is the Alpha and the Omega, who is and was and is to come, the Almighty (Revelation1:8).

Jesus invites me to spend time with Him, to take refuge in Him. I do so, and I am happy. 

Accept His Invitation

A DEVOTIONAL FOR OUR COME AWAY VIRTUAL QUIET DAY ON OCTOBER 17TH. CLICK HERE FOR MORE INFORMATION.

“And he said to them, ‘Come away by yourselves to a desolate place and rest a while.’ For many were coming and going, and they had not leisure even to eat. And they went away in the boat to a desolate place by themselves.” Mark 6: 31 – 32

This invitation happened when the disciples had returned to Jesus after he sent them two by two to share the gospel. This was also after burying John the Baptist. There may have been some fear, and they may have felt traumatized by the recent events. They had also just seen miraculous healing, and had cast out demons through the authority granted them by Jesus. 

Jesus invited the 12 to come away by themselves for rest. Have you experienced fear lately, or has your life been in upheaval?  Do you hear Jesus inviting you to come away and rest? Perhaps the idea of a desolate place appeals to you right now. Maybe you have spent quite a lot of time alone, and the thought of being secluded with Jesus, while in community with other world-weary believers, speaks to your soul.

I have spent more time inside my house in the past 5 months than I have at any other time in my life.  The idea of going away to nearly any place is appealing right now.  The idea of going away with my Lord to rest is bliss.

The desolate place where the disciples arrived was filled with people. Do you think this was a surprise to Jesus? The disciples asked Jesus to send the people away to find food for themselves. In response, Jesus answered them, “You give them something to eat.”  From their five loaves and two fishes, 5,000 people were fed.

The circumstances of today are not a surprise to God, but He will use it for His good, and like the disciples, all we need to do is show up with our measly five loaves and two fishes. He will do the multiplying. As with many things at this time, your ideal picture of rest in the Lord may not be available to you right now. You may have family or roommates in your space more than “normal.”  Jesus is still inviting you to rest. Ask the Lord to show you opportunities to rest in Him. Maybe you set aside time while others in the house are asleep, or you go for a walk with Jesus around your neighborhood. You can ask him to meet you while you are busy with your hands, but your mind is free, perhaps while doing a hobby that you enjoy.

Come Away with Me

A DEVOTIONAL FOR OUR COME AWAY VIRTUAL QUIET DAY ON OCTOBER 17TH. CLICK HERE FOR MORE INFORMATION.

Jesus invited His disciples to “…come away by yourselves to a desolate place and rest a while…” (Mk 6:31-32) For many years as a young mother I felt frustrated, unable to enjoy this invitation from the Lord. I had a morning devotional time, but more often than not that time would include a little person in my lap “helping” me. Though I loved the snuggle time with my children, their impeccable timing made staying quiet and focused impossible. I wanted to immerse myself deeply in scripture and prayer. Caring for others and fatigue from lack of sleep seemed to routinely thwart my plans.

One summer, an older woman from church invited me to a prayer retreat. This was not like any retreat I had ever been on before. It was going to be just the two of us. I decided to go, and I got someone to watch the children.  We met at our church and began by praying together, and then we moved into separate rooms.

She had given me a written outline with ideas for my time alone. For the first hour my mind raced. Thoughts about what my kids were doing, my unfinished laundry, what I was going to make for supper, what a silly idea this retreat was, and everything else under the sun sped through my thoughts. Then in a brief flash of clarity I thought, I should ask God for some help. I mean I was doing this for Him, right? Maybe He could shut off my mom-brain and give me some direction. As I continued to pray, my thoughts started slowing down. I opened my Bible and read. In the quietness of that empty room Jesus began filling my discouraged heart with peace. He reminded me how much He loved me and how significant my call to motherhood was. He revealed an area in my life where I was harboring unforgiveness. He later gave me grace to make amends. At one point I was emotionally spent and fell asleep. My spirit was at rest. He had renewed my hope and given me fresh understanding.

When I headed home that evening, I was joyful and calm. I had supernaturally experienced that I can do nothing without Him. Going forward, it wasn’t going to be enough to just think about Him or read someone else’s thoughts about Him. I was going to have to intentionally make time alone to “come away” with Jesus as a regular spiritual practice. I’m glad that sweet woman at church recognized my struggle and reached out to help me. Over the years learning to practice times of inner retreat became a lifeline. If you are stressed, worried, or overwhelmed, I’d like to encourage you. Jesus is faithful and He is still calling His disciples, to come away by ourselves with Him and rest awhile. Will you join Him?

The Rest of God

A DEVOTIONAL FOR OUR COME AWAY VIRTUAL QUIET DAY ON OCTOBER 17TH. CLICK HERE FOR MORE INFORMATION.

As a pregnant, working from home, mom of a toddler, I often wonder if I’ll ever be alone again. I have recently been able to wake up before my daughter for a couple of days a week and enjoy the early morning silence. I can feel Jesus’ pain as he tried to sneak away just to find the crowds had beat him to his destination.

My daughter is adorable she teaches me things every day, but she is not one who encourages rest, solitude or silence. She wants to cuddle if she’s tired, and she wants to get back down as soon as she’s done with me. We play a constant game of on and off the couch with Mommy.

I don’t want to ramble about life with a small child because I know that is NOT everyone’s experience. I am aware that many of you are in totally different stages of life. A dear friend was sitting on my couch recently, and we were comparing notes on the struggles in our lives. My friend is single and almost 30, (she’s amazing if you have a Christian guy email me his resume). She is struggling through the loneliness of being single and longing for a husband and family. I, of course, am struggling through pregnancy and toddler rearing and being a pastor’s wife. It is different. 

She said to me, “Rach, do you remember states of matter (by the way my friend is an elementary teacher)?” 

–Blank Look on my face- 

“I am liquid and you are solid right now, neither is bad, just different” (me still staring trying to understand her mind).

“You are solid, you can’t change much in your life, you have strict boundaries and ways that your life works, you are not flexible even if you want to be. I am liquid, I can fit into tight spaces, and I am flexible. We are both longing for other states of matter, and we can both see the other person’s benefits”

Jesus wasn’t solid or liquid. But he was fully God and fully Man. And so He does  understand the season you are in. Whether silence is easy or hard in your season, Jesus knows and understands.

One of my favorite authors on the topic of spiritual disciplines like silence, solitude, and rest is Ruth Haley Barton. In her book Sacred Rhythms: Arranging Our Lives for Spiritual Transformation, she speaks to the seasonal changes that affect spiritual disciplines. 

“One of the great temptations of the spiritual life is to believe that if I were in another season of life, I could be more spiritual. The truth is that spiritual transformation takes place as we embrace the challenges and opportunities associated with each season of our life. This involves honesty regarding the challenges (“At this stage in our family’s life, it is just not possible for me to get more than a half an hour in solitude a day”) and willingness to embrace the opportunities (“Being around small children is teaching me so much about being a child in God’s presence”). Our expectations about ordering our life during different seasons need to take int account what’s real and what cannot be changed; otherwise we set ourselves up for frustration and failure. This is a place for learning how to be compassionate with ourselves, because God certainly is.” 

I read this book as a married woman in the city. I used to work as a nurse three days a week and I had four days off. I would spend a whole day dedicated to the idea of Sabbath. Now Sabbath and rest and time with the Lord look totally different, and that’s okay. I encourage all of you to look not only at the restrictions of your state of matter, but also at the opportunities your season provides. 

May your heart find peace in where you are, and may your soul find rest in this season.

How do I rest?

A devotional for our Come Away virtual quiet day on October 17th. Click here for more information.

In Mark 6:31-32, Jesus takes initiative to tell the disciples to rest. It reminds me of how my children need the voice of their mother telling them to rest, and it reminds me of how I need a voice of authority telling me to rest. Nothing else in my world tells me to stop; nothing sets boundaries for me; nothing says, “Enough”.

Jesus’ command to the disciples in Mark 6 to rest comes on the heels of his sending them out to cast out demons and heal the sick. He had given them work to do. This reminds me of the post communion prayer: “Now send us out to do the work you have given us to do, to love and serve you as faithful witnesses of Christ our Lord.” God has given us work to do. But the example we see in Mark 6 is Jesus teaching the disciples a rhythm of work and rest. When we receive the work God has given us to do, do we also receive rest? In other words, are we doing the work God has given us to do how God wants us to do it?

Sometimes we hear the work God has for us, but totally miss the how. Too often we press into work anxiously and self focused, convinced that the results of the work depend entirely on us. “Consider the lilies of the field,” Jesus says in Matthew 6, “they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.” If we approach our work without putting the results of it in God’s hands, we will never exhale and feel the freedom to stop and rest. Thus a step into rest becomes a step into trusting God with the outcomes of our work.

This is more easily said than done. In Mark 6, even the disciples’ best efforts to get away were met by needy crowds. But, let us strive to enter the rest (Hebrews 4:11) that Christ desires for us, and not be hindered by our lack of trust in the Rest Giver. Let us remember that the Work Give is the Rest Giver. His call to work includes a call to rest. As you prayerfully consider the work God has given you to do, listen for how He wants you to do it, and ask Him for a more trusting and willing heart to partake in the rhythm of work and rest He is calling you to.