Prayers for Prickly People

We all have them in our lives, don’t we?  In-laws, acquaintances, business associates, relatives, co-workers, or church members, who just rub us the wrong way?  I learned long ago to describe these as prickly people, the challenging ones who make us dig deep to be nice.  And here in the South for sure, being nice is essential to preserving peace in our human interactions.

Cooperation and empathy do not come naturally to me.  As an introvert, I find that dealing with people, particularly the prickly ones, drains me of my reserves of kindness and thoughtfulness.  I get impatient with those who disagree with me, imagining that if I just explained myself better, they would certainly fall in line with my superior opinions.  My prayers are often focused on confession of these shortcomings and petitions for more patience and compassion with others.

But that doesn’t go far enough. If I am truly to love my neighbor, I must do better than simply get along with her.  Indeed, I am required to pursue the best for her.  And that’s hard.

I found something that works, though: praying for the prickly people.  Of course, the temptation for my sinner’s soul is to pray that they would come to agree with me, to accommodate me, to be easier to get along with for me. But the prayer the Lord requires of me is that my prickly neighbor may receive the desires of her heart, that she may know and love the Lord, that her children may rise up and call her blessed, that her husband may honor and cherish her, that she may receive what she needs to love the prickly people in her own life (like me, most likely). 

It's so hard!  But you know what I found?  If I am faithful to say the words of intercession for her frequently and with the most love I can summon up from my dark heart, then the Lord – over time - magnifies my kernel of obedience into something beautiful. Perhaps I won’t establish a close relationship with my prickly friend, but I have found that it is very hard to dislike someone for whom I have prayed consistently and fervently.  Jesus softens my heart toward her, clearly working His miracle before my eyes. 

Praise God for His loving kindness towards us, that we may be saved from ourselves! And if He does this great work between us and our prickly people, how much more He will do between us and our enemies.

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven. For he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same?   Matthew 5:43-46